and i recall the push more than the fall

Tift Merritt anyone? Broken -


I listen to this song at least once a day. It's an addiction. I really dig her.

Saw Indiana Jones yesterday. Memorial day with mom. we don't talk much anymore. actually i hardly ever talk anymore. i think i have completely lost the ability to hold a real conversation. if it wasn't for a few phone calls i would go all day without saying a word.

i've been reading a lot more lately. more than ever. it gives me something to do while i sit here and wait. i have only so much patience. i'm not very good at these waiting games. no calls today. i am getting anxious. and pretty fucking irritated.

please call soon. for my sanity ok?

ok so indiana sucked. the only saving grace is this wonderful woman

she's perfect. i swear.

ok, and this is kind of funny. even though it's sad when he gets maced.

el caminos in the west

We do not believe that love is free
cause anything worth fighting for doesn't come for free
we believe in time that you will see
how a war might save us
how a war might save us
we believe in time that you will see
the institutions of the world will only serve to enslave us.

it's time for you and i to face the signs and realize that living's a battle
for all the times we cried and told the lies and realized life's not a rehearsal

come on babe, swing your heartache
come on babe, swing your heartache

we have learned that hope does not come cheap
we all must sacrifice in the name of our beliefs
we believe in time that you will see
the frontier is misery
the frontier is misery
what do you think it is that makes us free?
a life without boundaries if you question everything

it's time for you and i to face the signs and realize that living's a battle
for all the times we've cried and told the lies and realized life's not a rehearsal

come on babe, swing your heartache
come on babe, swing your heartache

here's something that you should know
getting older doesn't always mean you grow
turning from the shadows following behind you
to stare at the sun can easily blind you
the only way to learn, you're not afraid to die
could very well involve risking your life
despite the contradictions that these worlds imply,
you've got to live on, live on, live on.

that's a lot of lyrics. i know. but they are nice. as is Young Galaxy. canadian bands are where it's at it seems.

this week i find out if my life changes. in a huge way. it will the end of my rodeo life as i know. i have been telling myself (and believing myself) that i was fine with giving up this barrel racing life. i mean really. it's been a good run. pretty much 23 years of rodeo after rodeo. i really only got into it because of my mother right??

but holy fucking shit. 23 years! and i've had tex for 13 of these years. he's basically my child. this all hit me pretty hard at about 6:30 am thursday morning.

i had just gotten home from claremore, oklahoma. i had to jump in the shower, pack my shit and immediately drive to houston for an interview. thursday was a long day to say the least. anyways, i think the interviews went well. but i am still hoping about the one in bastrop. i want to live in austin. i really really do. this is scary to admit this. because i might not get the job. and i will feel a little like a failure...

houston would be legit too though.

oh, and has anyone seen the line up for ACL? amazing!

I likey Lykke Li

Oh and Radiohead was fantasMIC. Great times in Houston.

mayday

been awhile. haven't been in the mood. And i have been pretty detached from the real world i think. i let myself get into something.


i feel like i'm losing touch with old loves though. and the only one to blame is myself. maybe once i get off this hill. get a real job in a real town. i have all summer. i'm going to start working hard for those old loves again. i can't lose them.

i hope i didn't destroy anything.

maybe this will help