You can't swim in a town this shallow - you will most assuredly drown tomorrow.

ok. i don't think houston is that horrible. i just had a slightly off day with this slightly off city. i guess today we didn't mesh and i let it get me down.

i also made the mistake of looking up the cnfr results from casper so far. i had that place for the last four summers. and to not be there now kind of hurts. it was always my escape. but it had an expiration date i guess and i can never go back. not in the same way i used to.

days like this make me miss the hole of vv. and not seeing people for days except my folks. it was usually just tex, my bike, and pi. i spent everyday strictly with things i loved and adored.

problem is i still felt trapped there. and like i wasn't contributing or doing anything fucking useful. i can live that way for a few weeks. sure. but not months and months.

now i have thrown myself back into society. and life has never seemed more real. and scary. and full of opportunities. and amazing. and...let's just hope i don't fuck this up.